Invisible Girls: The Truth About Sexual Abuse
Dr. Patti Feuereisen with Caroline Pincus
Filled with personal stories, Invisible Girls is a window into the world of sexual abuse. To those in our society who are uninformed this book is a fount of information and myth busting. For survivors of sexual abuse this book is a candle of encouragement, solidarity, hope and healing. Divided in four parts then into chapters Invisible Girls makes it easy to locate specific topics. The Epilogue provides an update on those who shared their stories and at the very back is a variety of current resources. This is an important book to study and share with others. JDP
From her website: Dr. Patti Feuereisen is a psychologist in private practice in Brooklyn Heights, N.Y. and Manhattan. During her 25 years of work counseling sexual abuse survivors, Dr. Patti found that girls who start to talk about their sexual abuse and bring it out into the open will get better, heal and thrive.
PART ONE – What is in Pandora’s box? Sexual abuse and how it affects us.
Disclosure is the only way we will take this topic from taboo discussion to triumph in prevention and prosecution. The author aptly explains the importance on speaking out about one’s sexual abuse,
“…Others might have feared letting such troubles out of the box, but Pandora knew that when you keep a box closed, you also close off hope. She knew that hope lies in opening the box, in revealing the truth, in releasing the trauma. She was not afraid. She knew that girls are healed every time women’s sexual trauma is let out of its box and released into the world. I invite all of you to join me in opening Pandora’s box.”
PART TWO – Girls’ Genius-How Girls Get through the Actual Abuse Experience.
After being sexually abused the child, teenager has to go to school, to a play date, or to a family event; they have to act normal, they have no choice. Therefore, they have to do whatever they can to survive the actual abuse. Some retreat or create alternate worlds where they have control.
“While my father was molesting me, I would look at the wallpaper with all the little fairies. I would pretend they were my friends, and that they were sprinkling fairy dust on me. I made up names for all the fairies, and I was the queen fairy, and I could protect every little girl in my world.”
PART THREE – Opening Pandora’s Box: Girls Tell Their Stories.
As you read the following excerpt from the book, realize these words were the reality of a very young child. This situation is not unusual; this is the norm.
“When you live in the same house with a predator, your sixth sense is alive and kicking at all times. You know he is going to do something that night, even before he considers what is at stake. The fight is only on the surface, a delicate exchange of looks, of using the other bodies around to try and plan your escape. It’s futile and you know it. In the Disney story, Bambi had a chance, the chance of running as fast as he could in the open field. That doesn’t mean he will make it, but he can run. I didn’t know I could, because no one had shown me how to. It would take me a while to learn-after all the harm was done.”
PART FOUR – The Road Back.
Advice, information and personal stories combine to encourage one’s own healing process, help in creating a support system to pursue a healthy life and is equally important to those wishing to help others. In closing the author says, “The one good reason I can think of to report your abuse and press charges is when your abuser is likely to be a danger to other girls.” I agree, and more importantly, report in order to stop the abuse against yourself, YOU are important. To the young child I would say, you might have to tell a dozen times before you are removed from the situation, I know it is dangerous for you to tell, but so is the abuse. Keep trying to find people to tell who will believe you, eventually there will be enough evidence and you will be set free. Do not give up hope! JDP
Link to publisher
Link to Author’s website